23 October 2009

Ouija Board

I have not done a good job--in fact, I have been remiss--at conveying to you one aspect of the city that lends it a certain air. There is an inordinately large undercurrent of weirdness here. In fact it is a riptide.

I attribute this in part to all the talent-challenged, would-be artists and would-be writers who do not paint and do not write and who have washed up here. As usual they are accompanied by hangers-on awash in harmless new age bullshit and the occult. These in turn are accompanied by the lunatic fringe of dangerous new age cretinism and potentially lethal homeopathic healing; unreconstructed, aging hippies with lavender lenses in their shades; impotently angry Marxists; folks holed up here awaiting the Mayan millennium in 2012; incense and tie-dye merchants; bell ringing Zen masters; bra-less chanting nymphs; spiritual nymphos; tarot card readers; and the generally whacked out and fucked up, all with that glaze in their eyes. In short, that portion of the human bell curve of normal distribution is a lot fatter here than it usually is in cities of this size. The mentally lame and the psychologically halt definitely contribute to the atmosphere of the city.

And they all encourage each other in the madness.

You will recall that I have mentioned the Civil List_SMA, a members only Yahoo Group catering to the expatriate community here. The folks to whom I refer are thick there with their postings.

And yet. . . . And yet. . . .Every once in a while one of these people passes along an item of valuable, nay, vital information. When that occurs, I am determined to pass it along to y'all as a kind of public service. In that vein I encountered the following exchange in the Civil List_SMA this morning over coffee.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Re: [Civil_SMA] houija board

HI,

THIS CAN SOUND A LITTLE RARE BUT I LIKE TO SAY IT ANYWAY: THE USE OF SUCH AN INSTRUMENT (IT'S REALLY THAT) IS KIND OF DANGEROUS AND IT DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU BELIEVE OR NOT IN LIFE AFTER DEATH, IT'S LIKE OPENING A WINDOW TO A STRANGE FORM OF ENERGY AND YOU DON'T KNOW IF IT'S GOOD O BAD THE ONE YOU POSSIBLY LET ENTER (UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED AND EXPERIENCED). I SUGGEST NOT TO TAKE IT AS A GAME OR A PLAY....I DID RESEARCH FOR SEVERAL YEARS WHEN I WAS IN ITALY. FELL FREE TO ASK MORE ABOUT.

CIAO

BRUNO
415 1139786


Re: [Civil_SMA] houija board

Ciao is right-on!! I think it is an invitation to dangerous entities. Beware. This is really not a chidren's or novice's game.

betse

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...IT'S ABOUT LEARNING TO DANCE IN THE RAIN!


* * * * * * * * * * * *

Now I admit that it does sound a little rare at first blush. But goddamnit, in these times we live in, you cannot be too careful. Dangerous entities abound. Why invite trouble? If you have been experiencing any phenomena in connection with playing around with your Ouija Board lately, perhaps you should reconsider all that. Or perhaps telephone Bruno and get some additional information as to just exactly what the hell may be going on.

Unless of course you are no novice, in which case I guess you would already have been fully informed the hard way as to what the hell is going on.

Betse is a certified space cadet. We will be hearing more from her.



10 comments:

Capitu said...

I too think that "Ciao is right-on!!" Be careful, be careful, Steve, of the forces out there. (Now, am I forgiven for saying: LOL)

Señor Steve said...

Conheci uma senhora Português aqui, Capitu. Ela não era louca.

Hlas said...

This is great stuff, Senor.

Señor Steve said...

Probably cruel of me, Hlas. But I am not going to change the general cruelty of the world by being nice all the time myself. I get to a point where things have built up and I must spew some venom.

It is the long hair. They are too comfortable with me. Want to share their latest theory. Only for them, at the moment they embrace it, it is no longer a just a theory.

Ruth said...

Steve, our minds have just met.

John said...

Speaking of the lunatic fringe of dangerous new age cretinism (a wonderfully acidic phrase, Steve), I wonder if you read about the recent deaths at a sweat lodge in Arizona. A bunch of people reportedly spent over $10,000 each for the privilege of becoming "spiritual warriors" under the tutelage of "guru" James Arthur Ray, who had drawn unwarranted positive attention to himself through an appearance on Oprah. Evidently some people are REALLY desperate to find meaning.

Here is the link: http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,25197,26251261-26397,00.html

No particular reason to pick this link, it was just at the top of the search results. Interesting, though, that the story finds its way to the other side of the world.

Oct. 23 update: Central City eviscerates the pretenders from Springville 60-14!

Señor Steve said...

I have read the article, John, and I can easily imagine these results. Days of fasting in the desert, sleep deprivation, mind-altering breathing exercises, and $10,000.00 for the privilege. Killer stuff. Literally.

I have sampled all these things in dribs and drabs. The sweat lodge is the Temazcal. I did not put anything else with it other than a day of fasting. I will not put anything else with it in the future. It is intense.

The usual routine hereabouts is to do a Temazcal immediately followed an all-night purification ceremony, which usually also involves a belly full of peyote. I will not do those two things together. A young man named Gustavo presided at my all-night purification ceremony up at San Luis Potosí along with a Huichol shaman from Real de Catorce. Prior to that ceremony many of the participants had also done a Temazcal before we arrived. Gustavo is a very cool guy, but he is a “spiritual warrior.” That is a phrase one hears often. "Spiritual warrior." His Temazcals are notoriously hot. One guy told me it felt as if his skin were melting.

So I do not wish to be too hypocritical. I have tried these things. They are fascinating and enjoyable and they are truly spiritual experiences. However, you still have to use your head for chrissakes. Your reason.

Springville. Pfffffft. I remember when the Springville teams were somebodies.

Señor Steve said...

And by the way, John, word has filtered down here via the internet that there is some big game or another in East Lansing tonight. I am trying not to pay attention.

John said...

Indeed there was a big one in East Lansing last night! It turned out to be one of the most exciting games in memory. A defensive slugfest that was not decided until the last seconds. Hawkeyes now 8-0 for the first time in history, with two "easier" games coming up at home against Indiana and Northwestern before encountering the Fuckeyes (oops!) in Columbus. You just never know what will happen in the Big Ten. Meanwhile, it is a lot of fun.

Señor Steve said...

I was in an Americanized restaurant up town last night, Harry’s New Orleáns Café & Oyster Bar, with a group. They had televisions in the bar area tuned to college football. I admit that I actually looked a couple of times to see if I could catch a score. I admit that freely.

When I returned home late, I was able to watch the highlights on espn.com.